Dear God

Dear God,

Quadriplegia, autonomic dysreflexia, sepsis, malaria, chronic bronchitis, bed sores and only you can tell how many more. You know that I currently suffer from more ailments that a common person can pronounce. Just during the past one month I have been rushed to the hospital twice in critical condition, I have had three episodes where my body almost gave up and I even saw the proverbial white light that is supposed to be the harbinger of entry into the other world, my blood pressure has dropped to 50/20 and risen to 200/140. My family members are on the verge of nervous breakdowns. I regularly lose consciousness, get breathless by the simple act of speaking, see my body temperature rise to extreme highs and drop to unbelievable lows. Only you know the amount of medicine that is injected into my veins, put into my mouth and applied on my body on a daily basis. I am beginning to forget what it feels like to have no pain anywhere in the body.

And yet… yet I am not complaining. I live on, I keep smiling, my faith does not waver, I refuse to lose hope, I am a survivor. You know I am doing my best.

But… Dear God, I know you don’t give anyone more than he can take, I know you wouldn’t let me break, you wouldn’t let my belief shake, but if it isn’t too much to ask, I really really need a break!

Keeping ourselves busy

Oh! How we hate when our minds start working, when they start asking questions, when we begin to question the most fundamental concepts. But we rarely do that, you are thinking? Of course you are right. We hate it so much that we cannot even contemplate the possibility of such an adventure. That is why we are so keen to keep ourselves busy. That is why when we have nothing to take our minds away from the important stuff, we feel restless. That is why we have such feelings as boredom, anxiety, depression.

I might be wrong. But I am going to try and check. I am going to spend the next free time I have not thinking how to make myself busy again. I am going to give my mind the space it so badly needs. I am going to let it loose. And yes, I am a little anxious. What if, as a result, I go crazy? Well, in case I don’t, I’ll have an idea of what this is all about, and if I do go nuts, well…..then you’ll have an idea.

Life is Fatal

Is there a specific moment when one realizes that s/he is going to die? I guess there is; in fact there are many such moments, because once the inevitability of death has been recognized, a whole system denial springs into action in one’s brain trying to undo the realization, trying to forget once again what it has unintentionally remembered.

Sometimes the brain succeeds; only to stumble upon the reality again at some future time. I have seen people survive cancer, terrible car wrecks, even falls from multiple stories; what I have never seen people survive is life. Life is the most fatal of all diseases. Once you are born, you are doomed to die sooner or later. So I have stopped my brain from trying to forger death. I have decided to always remember that I am going to die. And this decision has freed up my brain; liberated it. And with this newfound freedom, I try to make sure that I don’t spend a single moment without realizing that I am alive.

Do all of us sooner or later realize that we are going to die? Yes. Do all of us eventually realize that we are alive? No. It is tragic but true. So many die without ever knowing that they were alive.

Using the Indicator!

Try not to use the indicator too much, but if you want to use it, make sure that you keep it on even when you have no intention of turning anywhere, or better yet, indicate that you want to turn left but turn right instead. After all, you have some privacy, why should every Tom, Dick and Harry on the road know what your plans are!

I Kyun Test

Here’s a simple test. Just answer all questions honestly and whenever the answer is yes, ask yourself ‘Kyun?’ Why do you do it?

1. Do you feel irritated when someone points out your mistake, and feel satisfied when you point out others’ mistakes?

2. Do you regularly give money to beggars but refuse to buy stuff from those selling at traffic signals citing the reason that you don’t need it?

3. Do you get frustrated by slow traffic and try to get through any way you can even when you are not in a hurry to get anywhere?

4. Do you feel really proud when you make a wild guess and it turns out to be correct and also really glad when someone else’s wild guess proves to be wrong?

5. Do you almost never succeed in getting up at 5 a.m. for prayers and almost always succeed in getting up at 4 a.m. when you have to catch a flight or even watch something on TV?

6. Would you rather be wrong with everyone else than be right alone and face criticism?

7. Do you give more importance to praise from your boss than a smile from your mother?

8. Do you enjoy reading about human faults and weaknesses more when you feel that you don’t suffer from those weaknesses yourself but others do?

9. Do you hate your boss and think he is a chawal when he treats you badly but feel justified when you treat your subordinates / servants badly because they are chawals.

10. Do you feel that you know much more than your elders because you are the modern youth and also feel that you know much more than those younger than you, because you are older?

Copy Pasting Status

Please copy and paste this as your status if you know someone, or have heard of someone who knows someone that may know someone, who knows anyone. If you don’t know anyone, or even if you’ve heard of anyone that doesn’t know anyone who knows someone, then still copy this. Its important to spread the message. Oh, and the hearts. Don’t forget the hearts.

Happy Birthday Zehra

When I am weak and need strength; when I feel lost and need a guide; when I am confused and need to find some sense in life; when I am scared and want reassurance; when I am alone and need company; when I am sad and need to smile; when I am about give up and need encouragement; when I am close to falling and need support; even when I am having a great day and need nothing more than a partner to share it with; in all these times I find you and it is always enough.

Happy Birthday Zehra! My strength, my guide, my sense in life, my reassurance, my company, my smile, my encouragement, my support, my partner! May you live a long and blessed life.

Don’t tell me it never happened…


1. You stared at a digital watch continuously in the last minute of the hour to catch the moment when all numbers changed at once?

2. You tried to control your pee and succeeded for hours, only to fail seconds before you got your pants off?

3. The cop signaled to the car behind you or right in front of you to stop and your heart sank, even though you weren’t doing anything wrong?

4. Your wife or parents or someone called and asked where you were, and you spontaneously lied, without any reason at all?

5. You met someone and couldn’t remember his/her name and kept making lame efforts to get him to tell it, like ‘how do you spell your name?’

6. You nodded your head when asked if you knew about something even when you had no idea what it was?

7. You told a story claiming it happened to someone you know, when actually you had just heard it from someone who claimed it had happened to someone he/she knew?

8. You laughed at a joke or a witty remark hiding the fact that you did not get it?

9. You did not recognize the voice on the phone but pretended that you did, all the while trying to recall the name?

10. You pressed ‘like’ on a status not because you liked it, but because you wanted people to see that you liked such stuff?

Pakistan Idol

What if it was somehow possible for Bushra Ansaari, Ali Azmat and Hadiqa Kayani to audition for Pakistan Idol in front of the same three judges? Would they have been selected? I think not.

It would be fun to imagine what the reactions of the judges might have been if Ali Azmat had come and sang Pappu Yaar in front of them. Initially the three judges would have made those wide-eyed faces showing that they were having trouble believing what this guy was singing. And then they might have said this,

Bushra Ansari: Hai, kitni mushkil mein tha ye bacchha. Aap ko bohat log tang kartey hain lagta hai. Allah aap ko sehat de. Aur iss ka hairstyle to dekho. Iss tarah ke tainday ke saath to Pappu yaar tang karey ga na!

Ali Azmat: Mera khayal hai aap khud apney aap ko ziada tang kar rahey thay. Aap ki body movements aur shaklain daikh ke to mein darr gaya. Beta ye gaana aap ke liye nahi. Saaf nazar aa raha hai ke iss se aap ko bohat takleef hoti hai.

Hadiqa: Oonchay notes mein ja ke aap ki awaaz badal see jati hai. Aur mujhay star quality nazar nahi aayee. Aap bas apni Ammi ke saamney gaya karein. Balkey wo bhee na he gaya karein.

After listening to Hadiqa sing

Bushra: Style hai bacchi ka! Gaana waana to nahi aata lekin style poora hai. Aap modeling mein behtar chal sakti ho.

Ali Azmat: Aap ko bohat mehnat ki zaroorat hai. Moonh ziada khul jaata hai lekin sur koi nahi nikalta. Meri taraf se to No.

Hadiqa: I like your personality. But ye singing competition hai. Aap ko bohat mehnat ki zaroorat hai.

On Bushra Ansari

Bushra: Kitni cute hai ye. Itni pyaari. Gaana bas theek hai, par bohat he cute larki hai. Kya adayein hain.

Ali: Aap ki apni awaaz, aap ka apna style nazar nahi aa raha. You seem to be copying others. Apni koi shanakht nahi hai.

Hadiqa: I like your smile but aap ko bohat grooming chahiye. I don’t think you are suited for Pakistan Idol.

“Though I didn’t give much importance to your criticism bachhay, I think a little dose of truth won’t hurt here. The concept of not hurting someone’s feelings has been misused too much. I don’t lie just to save someone’s feelings from being hurt. If a person asks me whether I like him or not, I’ll tell him the truth. Remember! Your words and actions are like tools. Don’t hit someone in the face with your hammer. Bit if someone keeps hitting his face on your hammer, don’t give it much thought. In fact you might be perfectly justified in laughing at him.” Shuntoo