Dear God

Dear God,

Quadriplegia, autonomic dysreflexia, sepsis, malaria, chronic bronchitis, bed sores and only you can tell how many more. You know that I currently suffer from more ailments that a common person can pronounce. Just during the past one month I have been rushed to the hospital twice in critical condition, I have had three episodes where my body almost gave up and I even saw the proverbial white light that is supposed to be the harbinger of entry into the other world, my blood pressure has dropped to 50/20 and risen to 200/140. My family members are on the verge of nervous breakdowns. I regularly lose consciousness, get breathless by the simple act of speaking, see my body temperature rise to extreme highs and drop to unbelievable lows. Only you know the amount of medicine that is injected into my veins, put into my mouth and applied on my body on a daily basis. I am beginning to forget what it feels like to have no pain anywhere in the body.

And yet… yet I am not complaining. I live on, I keep smiling, my faith does not waver, I refuse to lose hope, I am a survivor. You know I am doing my best.

But… Dear God, I know you don’t give anyone more than he can take, I know you wouldn’t let me break, you wouldn’t let my belief shake, but if it isn’t too much to ask, I really really need a break!

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