Ten Things God should have told men and women

WOMEN

1. You can find the keys in your bag by looking inside it instead of fumbling for them.

2. The people in movies are just acting, they are not actually dying of cancer.

3. Men are not magicians, they cannot tell what you want unless you tell them.

4. It is not normal to remember every other woman’s dress in great detail.’

5. There is a rear view mirror and two side mirrors in a car and they are not for decoration.

6. A mess has to be created before you can clean it up. Be thankful to those who help satisfy your desire to clean up.

7. Secrets, by definition, should not be told to anyone, regardless of whether the fact that they are secrets is communicated too.

8. Your children are not the prettiest in the world, its just your motherly illusion.

9. Men who don’t lie are stupid and those who lie and get caught by you are pitiable.

10. Males of every species are more attractive. Look at lions, peacocks……and men.

MEN

1. You are not God!

2. A lie does not become the truth no matter how many times you repeat it.

3. Having the remote in your hand does not mean that you should change channels continuously.

4. Having an organ in your pants does not mean that you should use it for a brain.

5. If stuff was supposed to be on the floor, closets would not have been invented.

6. It looks stupid when you go crazy if some team from the other end of the world wins a match. Nobody from that team even knows you.

7. Ladies’ Tennis is not all about legs, there is also a racket and a ball.

8. When you think you are using a woman, it is actually the other way around.

9. It is okay to make a fool of yourself when trying to impress a woman but always have the guts to admit that you are the one who is being made a fool and mostly you still fail to impress her.

10. Your mother is not the only smartest woman in the world, its just your sonly illusion.

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